


The Dangers of the Domesticity Module

by chelsey



Category: Rod Allbright Alien Adventures - Coville
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-23
Updated: 2010-01-23
Packaged: 2017-10-06 15:24:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chelsey/pseuds/chelsey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Upon the birth of his daughter, Captain Grakker tries his hand at being a father, with both disastrous and adorable results.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Dangers of the Domesticity Module

If Grakker could pick out the reason (or reasons) it all went wrong, he would blame Madame Pong and her 'domesticity' module. He would blame them at great volume and great length. Even if nothing had gone wrong, he still would have found a way to blame them. As it stood, with Grakker in a violent rage, ray gun pointed at his only child, things had gone very, very wrong.

Madame Pong had requisitioned the domesticity module almost immediately upon learning of Snout and Grakker's impending arrival. She was thrilled, of course, but thought wisely that thrill should be measured with caution.

"It's for the protection of the child, Captain," she had said. (She could never get out of the habit of calling him that, even now, while working his temporary desk job.) "Of course you will love her, but newborns are loud and troublesome, and toddlers are argumentative. The extra calming influence will help you."

He had argued that judicious or diplomatic modules would serve just as well, but MP wouldn't hear of it. Neither would the Galactic Patrol. Her letter of requisition was so persuasive and elegantly worded that they all but ordered Grakker to comply. Though he had taken a temporary leave from his commission to be a father, the Galactic Patrol still reigned supreme. So, the domesticity module came and Grakker wore it.

The situation was not helped, though, when Snout laughed and referred to it as the Mommy Module. Had it been another person (or had Grakker been wearing a different module), the results would have been dire. As it was, Snout had to spend many hours soothing Grakker's bruised ego before the former captain would even leave his room with the module in place.

None of it mattered, of course, once little Susan Tahini finally hatched into the world. Grakker would have worn an Earth puppy module, or even a Velnarian mardong module, if it meant he could hold her tiny form in his arms for even a few moments longer. She was so obviously a part of Snout that he couldn't help but love her, and the little bits of himself he saw in her only increased his affection tenfold. _Ten-thousand fold._

She had smooth purple skin and a lithe, lizard-shaped body. She was stronger, even as a tiny baby, than others in her hatch year, and Grakker knew that must be because of him. Just as well he knew the tiny antennae and little furrowed brow were his too. He saw her, simply, as perfection embodied, and would spend hours standing over her bed, watching her sleep, peaceful contentment on her face. He wondered, even worried, about how she would be when she was older. He hoped she would possess Snout's calm mental powers. As it was, sometimes when holding her he thought he felt the warm, soothing presence of her mind brush across his. He wasn't even sure this was possible, and thought more than once to ask Snout. But, as much as he wanted them to be a family together, he jealously wished to keep this little part of her for himself.

(Snout knew, of course, but one of the Secrets of the Mental Masters is to know when to share your knowledge and when to keep your own counsel.)

Grakker was happy, Snout was happy, and, in her own way, Susan Tahini was happy. Things would have stayed that way, too, if only Grakker could overcome the perceived insult of the domesticity module. But he couldn't.

The day things changed began like any other day. Grakker ate. Grakker cooed at the baby. Grakker exercised. Grakker cuddled the baby. Grakker cooked, fed the baby, and did the dishes. (Grakker mentally uttered a thousand Friskan curses to the module.) Grakker sang the baby to sleep.

_The worm he slithers underground  
Over hill and under mound  
Meat for food and hole for home  
The worm, he doesn't like to roam_

Squishy worm, reticulated worm  
Born on a twig  
Squishy worm, reticulated worm  
Grow so big

The worm gives us food and fuel  
And money by the pile  
And Daddy will kill all the worms  
To make his little girl smile

Squishy worm, reticulated worm  
Born on a twig,  
Squishy worm, reticulated worm  
Grow so big.

After Susan was sleeping, Grakker sat in a chair and came up with a plan. Madame Pong was due for a standard visit that afternoon. While she was distracted, detailing the travels of the _Ferkel_ and going over the logs of its interim Captain, Grakker would strike. Well, he would sneak into her bag. The domesticity module would never allow him to strike a woman. While in her bag he would grab another module, switch it with his own, and then go along as if nothing had happened. The plan was foolproof.

It was foolproof, except for the two things Grakker hadn't considered: being asked to baby-sit, and the 'chaotic' module.

The switch went exactly as planned. MP and Snout had gone into the kitchen to make Palladian Leaf Juice. Grakker quickly reached into MP's module pod, found the C's (commanding module), and made the switch. Moments later Snout and MP returned. Snout looked oddly concerned.

"We're… out of juice leaves," he said. He was lying. "Madame Pong and I will go and collect some. Can you stay with Susan?"

Grakker knew something was wrong, because Snout never lied. Though he could probably have fooled anyone in the Universe, he could not fool Grakker. He did not dare question Snout, though, because protesting or fighting would have been a dead giveaway that he had switched modules, and he wanted MP off the planet and far away before any such discoveries were made. He had never interacted with Susan in any module but domesticity, but she was napping and he knew himself in commanding mode better than any other. They would be fine.

So "Yes, of course. Take your time," was his answer.

Madame Pong and Snout were gone twenty minutes. This is a long time if you are picking Palladian Juice Leaves. This is not a very long time at all if you are discussing Galactic Patrol research on experimental emergency modules. It is a very, very long time if you are a ship captain turned housewife who has found himself wearing one of these experimental emergency modules.

At first Grakker didn't notice anything wrong at all. The desire to tidy the living room disappeared. He felt edgy, but here in his home there was little to push edgy into chaos. So he sat. But then Susan woke up from her nap and began crying. Edgy became chaos. As bits of sanity slipped away from him, Grakker struggled to remain in control. But chaotic module was experimental for a reason, and the scientists hadn't yet worked out a way for the wearer to retain a sense of self while wearing it, or decided if they even wanted him to. (Grakker certainly was never himself in berserk module.)

Within a minute of the crying, Grakker had lost control. He stormed through the house violently, pushing over tables and chairs, breaking anything that could be broken, shouting Friskan and other curses at the top of his lungs, alternately trying to drown out the noise of the cry and to find its source. He could never be louder than Susan's cry, because every loud bang he made and every shout from his mouth in a voice that had once been so soothing only made her cry louder. When he reached her room and saw the source, there was a pause, and everything went red.

"SILENCE, LARVA, OR TASTE THE WRATH OF GRAKKER," he shouted.

Susan cried.

He knocked the shelf containing her books and toys to the floor in an effort to startle her into silence.

Susan only cried more.

In a flash he knew there was a ray gun in a drawer in his quarters, and he knew shooting it at the larva would cause it to cease its noise. Then, suddenly, he had it in his hands, and it was pointed as Susan.

She cried. He fired.

Nothing happened. ("Should you really keep a ray gun in a house with a small child?" Snout had asked. "It's not loaded," Grakker had said. Somehow, Grakker had known this, even in his rage.)

His rage boiled over, and he threw the gun across the room, and it exploded into pieces when it hit the wall.

"SILENCE," he screamed. Susan screamed. Grakker screamed. Susan screamed.

Grakker stormed across the room and yanked Susan not nearly gently enough out of her bed. "SILENCE, THING, OR I SHALL HAVE TO SILENCE YOU PERMENANTLY." When she did not become silent he knew the next thing to do was to throw her across the room. That would certainly silence her.

But instead he stood there, holding the screaming Susan at arm's length, perplexed. Everything chaotic said to throw the thing and be done with it. But everything else, something deeper and more certain, said that This Child Must Not Be Harmed. And so he stood motionless.

A few moments before, in a grove near their house, Snout had registered that something seriously, seriously wrong had occurred in Grakker's thought process. He related his worry to Madame Pong, who immediately discovered the switch Grakker had made, as well as his mistake. Snout had never moved faster in his life.

An icy chill passed through Snout upon reaching the house, when he saw the destruction and heard Susan's shrieks. When he made it to her room, though, he saw a curious sight. Grakker stood motionless, still holding Susan, wriggling, at arms' length. His face was completely blank.

"Grakker," Snout said cautiously, inching ever closer. "Let me hold Susan."

Grakker didn't respond. Snout carefully took the baby out of his hands and held her close to his chest. Her cries quieted almost immediately. "Grakker?" Snout repeated.

"I… couldn't hurt it," Grakker replied, as if in a dream. Then he dropped to the floor and began shaking violently. Madame Pong, coming close behind Snout, rushed in and saw Grakker.

"The module is malfunctioning!" she said. She hurried to his side and made a quick switch, replacing 'chaos' with 'comatose.' She looked up at Snout. "He must have tried to override it. He might have died."

Snout couldn't respond. He couldn't really process everything that had happened. He could only do whatever possible to calm Susan and simply agree when Madame Pong said she must take Grakker away for a while.

MP took Grakker to the Galactic Patrol headquarters. When he was sufficiently recovered he was placed in judicial mode and charged with gross endangerment of a minor. Madame Pong spoke in his defense, though, faulting her own error in judgment for ever suggesting someone such as Grakker could be happy in the trance-like state of domesticity. In the end it was decided that modifications would be made to diplomatic module, allowing Grakker to comfortably interact with a child without stifling his own thought processes. Then he would be allowed to return home, assuming he had a home to return to. Grakker gladly agreed to these conditions (suspiciously lenient), and waited mostly patiently at headquarters for the modifications to be made. Madame Pong had the domesticity module (and the chaos module) destroyed.

Even without the domesticity module, Grakker found the week away from home to be almost intolerable. On several occassions his thoughts lingered on Snout and Susan, wondering what they were doing, how they were doing, and whether they thought of him at all, or if those thoughts were even welcome. When the scientists had finally finished their work modifying his diplomatic module, he was free to go and he rushed home, heedless of worries. Getting there, though, he found himself afraid to enter. Susan was young and would forget, if she hadn't already, though he must live with the guilt. _But Snout_. Snout had dealt calmly with a great deal of madness from Grakker on many occasions before, but this time, Grakker worried, might be the end. For the sake of his own ego, he had done something foolish and reckless. To satisfy his own desire, he had put their child in grave danger. Could someone so plainly stupid deserve forgiveness and trust? Snout was the thing without which Grakker could not live. _Sine qua non_, the ancient Earthlings had called it. Grakker could barely live with what he had done; he knew he could _not_ live without Snout.

_"Then stop worrying about it and come inside, my captain."_ The intrusion into his thoughts was both jarring and welcome. Snout had not severed their bond. Snout did not even sound angry. He sounded _amused_.

Grakker entered their home warily still, as if going somewhere he did not belong. Snout's back was to the door, as he was sitting in the rocking chair Grakker usually used. Over his shoulder, Grakker could see Susan sleeping in his arms.

The thought-voice brushed against his mind again. _"Quiet. She is only just asleep."_

Grakker wordlessly shuffled across the room, noting that any damage he had done had been cleared away as if it had never occurred. He sat in the chair opposite Snout and stared at his husband and daughter. Snout looked up from Susan and stared back. Their eyes met, both full with unspoken words, and minds did not need to touch in order for messages to be conveyed. Snout nodded his head once, and went to put Susan in her bed. Grakker went to their quarters to wait, and when Snout returned they simply went to bed, laying in one another's arms comfortably, not speaking and with no need to. At one point Grakker thought he should say the words "I'm sorry," as if they could have a grand effect, but Snout squeezed him tightly and the words died on his lips and he knew Snout understood, because Snout always understood.

The next day, Grakker sat in his rocking chair, with his daughter in his arms and, minus one domesticity module, he sang,

_Squishy worm, reticulated worm  
Born on a twig  
Squishy worm, reticulated worm  
Grow so big_.


End file.
